Two days before my thirty-sixth birthday and I’m not in a celebratory mood at all. I’m not feeling gloomy or dark – I just don’t feel like celebrating my birthday. I suppose after you reach a certain age, birthdays become a steady reminder that you’re really getting older and that you’re advancing closer to the Autumn and the Winter of your life. When we were younger, we couldn’t wait to get older – to be cool, to be allowed to have our first sip of wine, to be allowed to go out on our own. Once we’ve passed that stage, we do anything we can to slow down the aging process – I guess it’s true that it’s hard to find that level of contentment sometimes. 🙂
I am strangely feeling calm at the moment considering my situation. Yes, I still feel a little bit of apprehension, but I’m feeling positive on the whole. I’m excited and can’t wait to experience the next stage in my life – exploring the next career step and seeing where it will bring me. God gives me my sense of calm, even in the midst of a whirling storm. The sermon today by Pastor John Ekundayo from Cornerstone Community Church in Singapore also gave me an extra boost of faith. His message is about waiting in the Lord to win – to press on with faith, just like the Canaanite woman in Matthew 15:21-28. Pastor John also prayed for me at the end of the sermon with some word of knowledge that gave me extra encouragement in my situation, even though he didn’t know what I was facing.
Well, it’s time for me to take my shower and head to bed! I have a relatively busy day tomorrow. I don’t know what the future brings, but I know that whatever happens, I will never get to walk alone. God is there walking me throughout the way!